For some time now, there has been an ongoing competition to find the most ridiculously named bands currently operating both online and in the real world. And make no mistake - there are many. It begs the question - did these folks have serious aspirations for legitmiate success?
Every week Ninjaface McGee will bring you the round up of real bands with most off-beat, offensive or just plain stupid monikers.
In the meantime, here are his Top Ten Real Bands:
Honest Bob & The Factory-To-Dealer Incentives
If he had better financing then he'd be off the charts but I can understand with today's gas prices why some people shy away.
Bathtub Shitter
There's obviously going to be a ton of grind/death & black metal bands on this list as they tend to have the best sense of humor. This takes the cake cause you know it had to really happen to one of the band members in some capacity, while I don't care to learn the full description it proves that toilets are just useless. Except for brushing your teeth.
Sexual Pantalones
Honestly, the best thing about this band is the fact that their logo is a dancing taco wearing a cowboy hat. Now if they only had a live mascot in the same gear and dubbed him "Senor Lechuga" that would be something. Then it would bridge the gap between the fans and his moustache wearing taco attitude.
Hydraulic Sandwich
I originally would use this as a weapon to ward off evil lunch ladies but upon closer inspection they just wear hair nets and have no desire to mess around in Olympic Track & Field events.
Hot Fudge Monday
There are an awful lot of "H" names in this list. Maybe we should make a movie based on the letter "H" like the number 23 but call it "Dinosaur Joe Makes a Comeback." That way everyone in the world will know exactly what the plot of the movie entails.
Hostile Omish
This will spawn a new breed of rappers such as "Cornface Killah", "Lil Wagon" & "The Black Hat". Do we have to name their mechanical royalties something else in order for them to collect?
Kampfar
Where'd you guys go on vacation? Oh, we went to Kampfar. Wow, was it the black metal winter camp you've always dreamed of? At least they don't have to travel far to take the black metal nature photos...or do they?
Cockpunch
The best mascot, the best merch, the music is good too. They just need to do a "versus" tour with someone like Meg & Dia, for the sheer fact the poster could read "Meg & Dia vs. Cockpunch". That would be fucking awesome!
We Smoke Fags
Granted this means something completely different to the English, but all I can think about is that Family Guy episode where Peter says, "Well, somebody tell this cigarette to get away from me."
Taint
aka Gitch, aka the Gooch, aka Heesh, aka the Gaza Strip
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